I am a fall person. You know it, I know it, the man on the moon knows it! I love the season…the leaves, the food, the sports (oh how I love the football), the festivities & holidays, my pumpkin spice lattes, and the fashion (I have way too many boots to be living in Houston).
But not this year. I’m not looking forward to fall. Not at all.
For the first time in years, I’m loving summer and in denial that fall is right around the corner.
You see “fall” is synonymous with “work” in my mind right now. I can’t believe that my 3.5 months of my maternity leave are almost over. I just can’t believe it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t like my job (I still really love & enjoy the work that I do), but I am not ready to leave my sweet little boy at home while I’m away during the day. Just the thought of it brings unbelievably large crocodile tears to my eyes. I’m not ready, and I’ll probably never be ready for it (not for his first day of kindergarten, or college, or his wedding day….none of it!). Dutch and I have been attached, literally, for over a year. Not having him with me all day every day makes my heart just ache and my stomach fall to my feet.
I know that I’m going to blubber my way all the way to school that first day back (let me be honest here, we all know that those crying sessions are going to occur more than just the first day). I know that this is going to be a huge learning curve from everything to learning to juggle working outside of the home with motherhood and being a wife, to accepting that I am not going to be perfect or an overachiever in any area of my life. I’ve got a lot of lessons that I’m getting ready to start learning.
If you have done this before, please share your tips with me. What will make this easier for Dutch? What will make this easier for me? Please say a prayer for us if you get a chance while we prepare for this transition.
For now, I’m embracing every single hot day in Houston this summer. I am NOT complaining about the heat. I am NOT filling my agenda with “to do’s” and extra events. I am NOT freaking out about meeting deadlines. I am NOT counting down the hours of baby snuggles; I’m cherishing them. I’m staying around the house in my pj’s all day loving on my baby.